I've been reflecting recently on what I remember of my own grandparents- probably my most enduring memory of my Grandma Marsden is her way of making Apple pie.
Do not be fooled my Grandma was definitely not Delia Smith each grandchild will tell you she could only make three things Potato cakes, Roast potatoes and Apple pie. Anything else well you survived it although there was one time with Turkey sandwiches she managed to give a fair few of the grandchildren food poisoning, I was 15 at the time and vegetarian I informed her I didn't eat meat and was told in no uncertain terms get it down you ( Grandma speak for you are eating it)
Food is so important it's one of our basic needs, ask either of my sons after school how they are and they grunt give them something to eat and then they open up, so many of my family gatherings have food in them and almost always cake, we chat, we eat, we break bread, we are family and now so many of my friends also have those memories where we sat and ate, sang spoke and shared precious moments - I don't think the food makes the moment but it helps prompt the memories, the tastes remind us of moments. For instance two summers ago we were on holiday and a friend of mine managed not once but twice to burn bagels now when I have a bagel I think of Matt.
So my Grandma's apple pie - well it was made with love and lots of sugar !, I could open the side door to their home and more often than not there was an apple pie and I was always offered a piece with some lemonade. It wasn't
a secret recipe it's not something I've written down it's just something I know how to make and when I do I hear her voice telling me she loves me because that was what her apple pie was, in the midst of all of her children of which she had 7 and grandchildren 23 of us,in the home that was 113 Lord Lane she made time to make apple pie stand in her kitchen no matter how many children she had around her ankles and there were usually many if they were not directly related via blood she somehow had connection.
( below are my children making an apple pie a few years ago now)
Apple pie reminds me to make room to keep my front door open to tell people I love them often - it reminds me that no matter how little I have I can share. It reminds me of a tiny lady who was most happy when surrounded by family a matriarch a strong woman who I had the privilege of calling Grandma.
Certain meals or food will remind you of a loved one, what is your family recipe maybe if you are having a moment and need a reminder, grab the ingredients use your hands, make that item let the tears flow as you measure things out if you need to and enjoy eating remembering all the stories, the laughter and the joy. Remember you sat at those tables together and those moments will be with you forever.
That's my Grandma, near to my Grandad at all times and just being part of the community and probably telling the child just in shot how loved they are.
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